Spring Cleaning: The Self Love Edition with Cynthia of Cynspo
I am super, super excited to bring you something new to the blog today, and that something new is my very first guest blog from Cynthia of the blog Cynspo! Cynthia is a fellow lifestyle blogger friend & travel nurse who I met online a couple of years ago, and we’ve become great friends. I always admired the outlook and passion that Cynthia has for life, and I knew when I opened up my platform to guest bloggers, that I wanted her to be the first. Before you start reading, don’t forget to check out her blog & follow along on Instagram — so, without further ado; take it away Cynthia!
We’re getting to the time of year where the snow starts to melt and spring feels like it’s not that far off. We all have a laundry list of things to do, whether we’re focusing on our closets or our gardens. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in sorting through our physical surroundings that we forget to take this as an opportunity to reflect and sort through our own emotions, challenges and triumphs. I’m a firm believer that both of your internal and external environments play a huge role in how we live our day to day lives, which brings me to shed a little light on self love (and why you should include it in your spring cleaning rituals).
What Self Love Means
Self love, by definition, means ‘regard for one’s own well being and happiness’. For a lot of us, this doesn’t come naturally. We learned as children not to be selfish, and to make sure we put others before ourselves. While these are both things to keep in mind, for a lot of us we have equated putting ourselves first and tending to our own needs as ‘selfish’, which couldn’t be further from the truth. Self love is the feeling of appreciation for ourselves, and to achieve that we perform daily actions that support our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.
Sometimes self love is used interchangeably with self care. Self love incorporates many aspects of self care into it, and they both aim to do the same thing. Self love is to accept and appreciate who you are presently, and to maintain that well being in a way that resonates with you.
What Self Love Looks Like
There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to self love. Self love is going to look different for each person, because we all have different variations of what contributes to our own well being and happiness. Below are some of the ways we can practice self love.
PRIORITIZING OURSELVES
Deciding to put yourself and your needs first is important when it comes to self love. Though we feel selfish when we do put ourselves first, it is absolutely necessary to our well beings that we tend to our own needs and wants. Before you can help anyone else, you need to be able to help yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup. This means your number one priority is to keep your cup full.
SETTING BOUNDARIES
Setting boundaries is a great way to protect and preserve your energy. Decide what you are willing to allow and not allow in your life, and build boundaries around these areas. Saying no, setting limitations on time spent with people and things that don’t resonate with you, and not tolerating certain behaviours and actions from other people are some examples of boundary setting.
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
Say kind things to yourself! It’s easy for us to criticize ourselves, however praise doesn’t seem to flow as easily. It may take time and practice, but take notice of the way you speak to yourself. Would you be able to speak to a child the way you speak to yourself? Sometimes, envisioning a younger version of yourself can help improve your inner voice.
If you still find yourself struggling to think of kind things to say, try searching the internet for positive affirmations and you may find some that resonate with you. It can be easier to repeat something already written if you’re struggling to get started in this area.
DAILY ACTIONS
These are the things you do every day to maintain your overall well being. Moving our bodies, getting enough rest, nourishing ourselves, and making time for things we enjoy are things we do on a regular basis, sometimes without even thinking about it.
Spring Meaning
It’s not surprising that we feel the urge to clean and have a fresh start during Spring, as Spring is centred around planting seeds, revival and rebirth. Spring is the season of new beginnings and growth. We feel the heaviness of winter fading and that becomes the perfect opportunity to reflect and make changes to our lives. So why not capitalize on the natural feeling in the air? Harness the energy around you to make this time all that more impactful for you.
A Time to Reflect & Prepare
Now that we have a better understanding of self love and what that looks like for us, we can give that area of our lives a little spring clean up!
REFLECT
Sitting down and taking an inventory of what the present state looks like for you is an important step. This is where you’re going to find the difference between what you’re currently doing, and what you want to be doing. The best way to do this is with a pen and paper. Some things you may want to ask yourself are:
What do I do every single day that supports my well being (physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually).
What do I honestly think of myself?
How do I show myself love right now?
What do I think I’m doing well? What do I think could be changed?
FIND THE CLUTTER
I don’t mean the physical clutter either. What is clogging up your life? What takes up your time but doesn’t have to? Which people do you find absolutely draining to be around? What things do you find yourself tripping over and over? What things are you holding onto from the past that you would be better off without? Pay close attention to the things that pop into mind as you read through those questions.
PRIORITIZE
After reflecting, it’s time to prioritize which areas of your life need the most attention first. Are you struggling to meet your daily basic needs? Do you feel like your inner dialogue is toxic and needs to change ASAP? Do you need to stop saying yes to things you don’t want to do in order to put yourself first?
Take a look at what you’ve written and see what stands out the most for you. Decide to tackle the top three things that resonate with you and you feel will invoke the most positive change in your life. Some examples may be ‘moving your body every day’, or ‘practice speaking kind words to myself in the mirror before work’, or ‘I’m going to focus on cooking more meals at home during the week’. Stick with three for the time being. Remember that you can always come back, but to get started pick the most pressing things that will have the most profound impact.
The Importance of Envisioning Your Dream Life
No doubt that throughout this process, your mind has wandered towards what your dream life would look like. It’s natural, and it’s a very important part of what is going to keep you focused throughout this process.
Envisioning your dream life isn’t childish or a waste of time, it’s actually an important step towards making it a reality. By visualizing your dream life (in detail, as specifically as possible). You give yourself permission to have that life, as well as program your subconscious into finding a way to live that life.
Start by writing out your life very specifically, in detail. What does a life of self love look like? What actions would you take to achieve your best state of well being? What does your highest level of well being look like to you? Write it all down. In detail. Pay specific attention to what it is that a life full of well being and happiness looks like to you.
Showing Up For Yourself
This is the part where you get to get your hands dirty and dive in. You’ve had time to really reflect and sort through your life as is, what you want to change and how your dream life looks. You’ve outlined your dream life and what it is that you want to achieve. Now you can work on your action plan, and the trick is to keep it short and sweet. So often we get tangled up in the planning. We make elaborate plans and then don’t follow through. It looks fantastic on paper, but in reality it never took off. So keep it short and to the point. Something to refer back to, but not where the energy lives.
When we looked closely at our dream life, what did that entail? How did our priorities match up with our dream life? What things did we want to work on? Writing it down is the guideline, but what you’re going to do to put it into action by showing up. Showing up is the action plan. You can write it down in 18 different colours. You can make a PowerPoint presentation. You can write it in the sky. But if you don’t show up, your action plan isn’t going to help you. Take the three things (back when we were prioritizing, three things that are manageable and will improve your well being) you wanted to improve and figure out what you’re going to do every single day to show up for yourself. And then show up.
This part isn’t immediate, nor is it time specific. You might even feel a little bit lost. You might even feel like you’re not doing anything at all really. But by showing up for yourself repeatedly, you create a habit. If it helps, create a habit tracker. Cross off days on your calendar. Circle the date. Whatever helps you realize you’re making positive progress, keep that in mind!
Letting Go
There is so much to gain when you decide to live a life rich in self love. You gain a deeper appreciation for yourself. You multiply the amount of love you have for yourself. You infuse new habits and opportunities into your lifestyle. But there is also much to be said about what must be let go when you decide to embrace a life of self love. Inevitably, to make room for the new, we have to get rid of the old. Just like cleaning out your closet, you will sort through your life and find there are things you want to keep, and things that no longer fit.
When you start putting yourself first and making changes to better your life, there are things and people that no longer fit into your life. People and things that drain your energy and time without giving much back no longer serve a purpose, and don’t align with the changes you’re making. It’s okay to let these things go. Not everything or everyone and life can be carried through all seasons. To live the life you deserve - one bursting with joy and your best interests, you will have to learn to let go.
Making it a Lifestyle
Springtime is such a great catalyst for things feeling like they’re falling into place, getting organized and sorted out. While I want you to capitalize on the energy boost this time of year brings, I also don’t want you to hold back on yourself for the rest of it. I don’t want you to be stingy with the amount of self love you have for yourself. I don’t want you to hold out on yourself, or simply let the clutter build or the dust collect.
When you start to truly embrace a life of self love, like light through cracks it eventually pours in. It changes you honestly. To live a life where you take care of yourself, do better by yourself, and remove anything that doesn’t serve or resonate with you. And when you start to slack or fall off the wagon, you feel it. You feel it because you aren’t meeting your basic needs. You aren’t giving yourself the love you deserve.
So when you decide to start making self love your number one priority, I hope it sets you up for a lifetime love affair with your own life. I hope you build a life you fall in love with, inside and out. I hope you realize there is no limit to the amount of joy you can feel. I hope you nourish your body, mind and soul every single day. I hope you take care of yourself, indulge even. I hope you speak the kindest words to yourself, like you are your own best friend.
So while this is the spring cleaning guide to introducing self love into your life, I hope this is something you take with you and continue to multiply every single day.
